RELEASE TOUR - SECRETS? BY A.L. SIMPSON

SECRETS?

by A.L. Simpson

NEW RELEASE - ANGUISH (Please support for mental health awareness)

ANGUISH

A Harper's Rock Legacy Series, Book 1
by JJ Ellis

EXCERPT CHAPTER 5 - LETTING GO

Chapter 5 excerpt and we are winding down. Release day is in about two weeks. I'm getting excited to introduce you to JC and Trevor. I hope you fall in love with them too! Pre-order now!  ALL OTHER RETAILERS  ---- AMAZON

You can also find Ben and JC's story for Pre-Order (due Feb 21). AMAZON

By the time JC was done taking pictures he was steeped in guilt. Why, every time he had a new experience, did he wonder what Ben would think about it. He was in paradise with the most amazing man he’d met in years, one he felt comfortable saying the words I love you too, and here he was thinking about Ben. But he and Ben had talked many times about the different kinds of places they wanted to see together…and this was one of those kinds of places.

Sometimes he wished that he and Ben had only been best friends, that they had never fallen in love. But that in itself brought more guilt because he wouldn’t trade their time together for anything in the world. His childhood had made him who he was today. He was a successful, well-loved teacher, a father to two amazing kids, and what some said was a good man. His main fault was his inability to let go of things he’d once loved. But at least he had loved. At least he was capable of love – complete, absolute love.

“Hey, how long have you been back?” Trevor asked as he walked into the main room of their villa.

“Not long. Are you ready for lunch?”

“Yeah…is everything okay?”

“Yeah, after last night how could it not be.” But JC knew he didn’t sound convincing.

“We’ll talk while we eat,” Trevor said matter-of-factly.

They decided to eat their lunch outside on the beach. It was a beautiful, sunny day out and the ocean breeze was light and would keep them cool.

Trevor passed JC the sweetener for his tea then brought up his boyfriend’s mood. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m pretty sure you won’t want to hear it.”

“Now that you’ve said that I definitely want to hear it.”

With a sigh, JC set his burger back on his plate and looked out over the ocean. “I’m doing it again. I was walking along the beach taking pictures and wishing you were there with me…you know, the whole romantic scene of a couple walking along the beach hand in hand. But then my thoughts shifted, and I wondered what Ben would think of this place. What it would have been like if we’d been able to come here.”

Trevor shifted in his seat and cleared his throat. He was obviously uncomfortable with what his boyfriend was saying. “I…Do you wish you’d come here with him instead of me?”

“No!” JC was quick to answer. “No, not at all. I only want to be here with you, but I wonder what things would have been like if it had ended differently for Ben. It’s the same old shit that gets in the way every fucking time!”

“I’m not going to say that it doesn’t feel like a knife was sliced across my chest just now,” Trevor said softly. “But I understand what you mean.”

“I’m sorry.”

Trevor nodded and took a bite of his food. Not that it had any taste anymore. But he knew he needed to eat. JC did the same.”

“I wonder, all the time, why he died. If I knew that, if I knew what happened, I could stop thinking about him. He was fine one day and the next he went up to the cabin and killed himself. I truly believe he was fine when he drove away from Harper’s Rock that day. What happened in those few hours before he pulled the trigger.”

Trevor reached over, tentatively, and touched his hand. “Maybe you should go talk to the Harpers. Maybe they can help you.”

“But they don’t know,” he whispered.

“But maybe the mutual hurt, their mutual questions can help you. It would be worth a shot.”

“I don’t know if I can.”

Trevor looked away, over at another couple walking along the main beach. “You’ll have to eventually. Sooner rather than later please.”

“You’re going to walk away after all aren’t you?”

Trevor was quiet, trying to control his breathing. “No. I love you and I’ll stick by you for as long as I can, but this is the first time I’ve ever been hurt by something you said about Ben. I’m afraid it will become a habit.”

“I’m so sorry. I thought things were getting better, then all of a sudden…”

“All of a sudden you’re doing stuff that you once wanted to do with him and it’s affecting you. I understand, but it still hurts that I’m not the only one on your mind. Do you think of him when we…when we make love?”

“No. I thought only of you and how much I love you and how good you make me feel.”

“Good. Maybe because that is something you and Ben actually did together?”

“Could be. I’ll try not to let you know when this happens in the future. I don’t like hurting you.”

Trevor actually chuckled. “You’re not a very good actor, I can tell when you are upset even if you are trying to hide it. Just promise me that you’ll be open and honest and we’ll talk it out. Okay?”

“Yeah,” JC said, taking Trevor’s hand and kissing his palm. “I promise.” But he knew from that point on he would do everything he could do to be a better actor. He couldn’t stand the thought of hurting the man he loved that much.

EXCERPT CHAPTER 3- LETTING GO

NEW EXCERPT - CHAPTER 3 ENJOY!!! http://amzn.to/2zMQKGg

JC stirred when he heard a buzzing sound, but he was so comfortable he didn’t want to acknowledge it until suddenly the arm that had been draped over him was gone. He saw Trevor standing next to the bed, ending a call.

“Hey, the hospital just paged me. One of my newborn patients is ready to check out soon and I have to go examine him one more time before release. I’ll be back in about an hour and we can grab some breakfast.”

“Okay,” JC said softly, a smile on his face. “What time is it?”

“Nine a.m. Go back to sleep for a while,” Trevor demanded as he bent down and kissed him on the lips. “You’re still exhausted.”

JC’s eyes drifted closed and shortly after he heard the bedroom door shut he was asleep again. The next time he woke up it was a half hour later and there was a wet, cold nose on his bare back. “Morning Max,” he mumbled. “Do you need to go out?” The dog spun in a circle and jumped down off the bed, racing to the door with a whine. “I guess that’s my answer.”

Picking his pants up off the chair where Trevor had tossed their clothes, he slipped into them and followed Max out of the room and down the stairs. Apparently, Max had a doggy door and could take care of himself once he was out of the bedroom, so he followed the smell of coffee into the kitchen. A nice fresh pot sat in the coffee maker on the dark solid surface counter top. Pouring himself a cup he headed out to the living room to grab his phone and check for messages. The minute he activated the screen, the time and date popped up. The date…one forever burned in his brain stared back at him, obscuring the rest of the screen. His baby girl had now been gone for eight years.

He and Jenny had conceived her perhaps for the wrong reason…to try to resurrect their bond when both knew their marriage and a normal sex life had been doomed from the start. But he had loved that little girl from the minute he saw the positive pregnancy test…before he even knew if he would have a daughter or a son. Never once had he regretted her but sometimes he still felt guilty. Maybe if they hadn’t conceived her for such selfish reasons…

As Max came charging into the room, JC remembered where he was - at Dr. Trevor Alexander’s house after they’d had sex and spent the night in each other’s arms. How could he have betrayed his daughter like that? This man was the last person he should have been spending time with. What the hell had he been thinking?

Leaving his coffee cup sitting on the coffee table, he hurried upstairs to get dressed then rushed back down to find a pen and paper so he could leave Trevor a note. As good as everything had felt over the last two days, he couldn’t imagine himself continuing what they’d started. He was the wrong person at the wrong time. 

EXCERPT CHAPTER 2 - LETTING GO

Hey hey, here is the excerpt from Chapter 2 from Letting Go. JC and Trevor are just getting to know each other and it is going to be a hell of a ride. Enjoy! 

Pre-order links 

Amazon: http://amzn.to/2zMQKGg

All other retailers: http://bit.ly/2C1hgNF

JC rolled over in bed trying to silence his alarm…the alarm that was causing his head to scream at him. But this ringing wasn’t steady, it couldn’t be his alarm. The front door! Who in the hell would be ringing his doorbell at…shit! It was 10:30 in the morning. Apparently, he had slept through his actual alarm at eight a.m.

“Hold on!” he hollered out despite what it did to the throbbing in his head. He levered himself out of bed and hurried out to the living room in just his pajama bottoms. Whoever kept ringing the bell was going to get a punch in the gut if there wasn’t a damn good reason for it.

Opening the door with a clipped, “What!” JC stared into the stunning blue eyes of Doctor Trevor Alexander. After a moment of shock passed, JC squared his shoulders. “I thought you agreed that I would never have to see you again.”

A bright smile lit Trevor’s face. “Last night, before you got out of the car, you said, and I quote – I’ll see you later. So, I figured that was your way of saying that you actually did want to see me again. Besides, I brought breakfast.”

JC’s brain warred with his growling stomach and he finally stepped aside so Trevor could enter. “If that’s bagels and coffee, you’re my new best friend.”

“I guess we’re best friends then,” Trevor said with a smile as he headed for the kitchen. “Great place. I think this was Model III, right? I bought Model IV, but I liked this one too.”

“Yeah, this was my favorite but four wasn’t far behind.”

As Trevor set their food out on the breakfast bar, he looked up at JC. “Doesn’t the wife usually get the house?”

“Not this time,” he stated. “She didn’t want it; too many painful memories. She moved in with her sister, who is also divorced, and seems happy where she is. Besides, I was always a little bit too attached to this house I guess.” He didn’t tell the very handsome man standing before him that he was so attached because the real name of Model III was The Benjamin.

“Sit. Eat,” Trevor demanded as he took his own seat at the breakfast bar. “I hope you like cream cheese. And if I remember from last night, you like your coffee black.”

“It’s perfect, thank you. If you hadn’t stopped by I would have slept until after noon and wasted a whole day off.”

“We can’t have that now, can we. How do you feel about hiking?”

JC felt a little skip in his chest. It seemed he and the doctor might have something else in common. “My boys and I go hiking a couple of times every month. Why?”

“Max and I are heading up to the south loop of Elk Meadow Park here in a bit. I thought maybe you’d like to join us…sweat some of that alcohol out of your system.”

Max? Who the hell was Max? And why the hell did he care so much? Just as quickly as the green-eyed monster swelled up in his belly he forced it back into submission. He had no reason to be jealous. He didn’t even really like the good doctor. “I don’t know…I don’t want to interfere with your plans.”

“You wouldn’t be interfering. It’s just a man and his Rottweiler taking a hike in the beauty that is Colorado.”

“Your Rottweiler huh?” he mumbled. The green-eyed monster no longer had to be suppressed, he vanished – poof – into thin air. “Sure, I guess that would be okay, and you’re right I need to get this crap out of my system. I feel like shit.”

“No doubt. Why don’t you go take a shower and I’ll clean up here? Then we can go pick up Max and be on our way.”

JC stood and stretched. “Are you trying to tell me I stink?” He actually knew he did. He smelled heavily of booze.

“You smell like you’ve been sweating alcohol. But I’m not complaining. I do think a shower would make you feel better, though.”

“You’re right, it would. I’ll be right back.”

“Wait, before you go,” Trevor said as he grabbed JC’s arm to pull him back. “I’ve been wanting to do this since I noticed you staring at me last night.” Their lips met for a brief kiss that held so much promise.

“Really?” JC murmured as he turned and fled to the bathroom. Now, through his whole shower, he would be thinking about that kiss and the totally attractive man who had given it to him. His body would be aching even more when he was done than when he first stepped into the stall.